Just a thought

Life

Almost 12 years have passed since I left my home to pursue Engineering. I still remember my mother accompanying me on the first day of my Hostel Life. Our rooms were still not ready and mine was room #1. There were labourers all around placing the beds…painting the walls, etc. I even applied my personal touch to the walls…My mother was busy unpacking my luggage and setting up my room while I was busy checking out other rooms…The casual introduction with my fellow hostel mates.

Then I was introduced to my roommate with whom I would be sharing my room. I paused and it was then that reality hit me….I was going to live with a stranger. I am a happy to go lucky kind of a person and moved on to checking out the place with curiosity.

It was 4:30 pm and my mother had a 6 o’ clock train back home. I simply started pushing my mother…”Maa leave all this (unpacking and settling my room)…get ready we have to go to the station else you will miss your train….” We both got ready and the moment I stepped out of my hostel gate the guard stopped me…”Madam you cannot go out”..”Damn you! I am going to drop my mother to the station”, but all my explanations were in vain…He was firm on his decision …”Rules are Rules Madam”….My mother walked out and I stayed inside the gate…there were tears in her eyes…she simply placed her hands on my cheeks and said “Stay safe”…and started to walk. That hard truth hit my face….I was not at home anymore….I had to live alone minus the love and security of my home…I simply ran towards the terrace so that I could see my mother for few more seconds…she kept on waving till she faded amidst the silhouette of the busy road.

I was filled with a deep vacuum. I was always thrilled about living alone…being independent but now I simply wanted to go back home….my parents…sister..my pet jojo…my bed..my TV…the basic walls seemed so precious …..Couldn’t stop crying…wept the entire night…….I realized this was my “Bidaai” and there is no returning home. I may go for vacations…but that would be a limited stay.

After my engineering I moved to Kolkata to work…and every week I used to visit home…..nothing on this earth could have stopped me……Staying away from home taught me the importance of family….Though I was away from home still there was a satisfaction, the distance between Kolkata and Kharagpur (my home) is only 2hrs with easy modes of communication. At times I would simply go back home on a Wednesday and come back on Thursday… I was content…

Life goes on and I got married and my luck brought me to Bangalore….2000 kms away from my home. Previously I went home once a week and now it’s once a year.

Now I am a mother of a cute little one year old daughter and motherhood has made me realize all the hardships a mother has to face to bring up her child…those endless sleepless nights…which make me miss my family even more. Today I know my parents are getting old…they are losing their physical and mental agility…and they are all alone. Life comes with an expiry date and this thought haunts me.

When I was a kid I used to cling to my parents for the silliest reasons and they were always there on the slightest sigh. But today when they are old and they need me…my time…my presence… I am not there to even offer them a glass of water. It pains…pains real bad. I can’t help it. It was then I promised myself that the only way I can prove to be a good daughter is by being a good mother. But still there is that hollow feeling within…..

Plight of a Working Woman.

Life

 The only difference between men and women is that women are able to create new little human beings in their bodies while simultaneously writing books, driving tractors, working in offices, planting crops–in general, doing everything men do.”

5 am and the alarm rings, oh no I just slept and it’s morning now? Gosh!!! It’s already 5:05 am, wish I could have slept some more. No I can’t do that so many work is still pending. Ohhh!!!! My back can’t deal with this back ache anymore.  I guess many of us(Working mother’s) feel the same. And the day starts. First let me prepare the breakfast and Lunch…quick the hands of the clock are moving really fast..Oh God washing still left. Let’s put the clothes’ in the Washing machine and in the mean time I can pack the lunch. It’s already time and I need to get ready, got to hide my wrinkles and fine lines and yes those dark circles. Thank GOD these cosmetic companies have come out with certain good product which does manages to make us look pretty and fresh.

It’s almost 6:40 dear wake up your school bus leaves with 7:30. -Mamma please 2 mins more..Ok dear. Honey please wake up its 6:40am.Dear why do u look like a monster early in the morning comes the reply. Finally after lot of coaxing which finally leads to screaming, my daughter and husband pull themselves out of the bed. First daughter has to take charge of the bathroom and every 5 mins there’s a knock on the bathroom road. Hope you are brushing your teeth properly and hurry else we will miss the bus. On the other hand Dearie husband locked himself inside the bathroom with the newspaper so that this monster can’t disturb him.  In the mean time checked her school bag.  School uniform is ready. Shoes polished and ready.  One more episode would be tying her hair.

Finally managed to get my daughter ready and wave her as she boards the school bus. Now the next little child awaits my attention. There I can hear him shouting- where is my hankie??…my socks…??Can’t you keep things arranged?  (Oh yes I can definitely keep things arranged if you stop throwing them here and there). Finally left home. Just managed to take a bite of that sandwich on the way. After a lot of hustle and bustle managed to reach office and there all the eyebrows raised cause once again I am late today-as usual.

In office I am not a woman I am a fellow employee expected to work at par with her counterparts. Attend meetings, meeting targets else explanations. Breaking our head and debugging. Its 5:00 pm need to rush but so much of work is still pending. I know I know people gossiping behind –just see she came late and leaving early but who cares, my daughter who is in the playschool now after her school got over is waiting for me.

6:15 reached home. My daughter I eagerly waiting to open her box filled with excitement and there me running around to prepare some snacks for her-she may be hungry after the entire day and start dinner preparations yet lends her all her attention. 7:30 husband returns.  No mood for having homemade snacks so just leaves to attend his evening ADDA with friends. Mom dear sits down with homework’s and evening study sessions. Even managing the Dinner. 9:30 pm all ready for dinner. Post dinner Husband sits down with Laptop or the TV. Though daughter has some inclination towards the TV but no there is no TIME. You need to sleep now; tomorrow morning there is school again. After putting her daughter to sleep she sits down for ironing the next day clothes. Polishing her shoes. Finally its 11:00pm and she is dead. You kick her, punch her or prick her she is simply DEAD. However there is an exception. If the kid is not well then she can spend her entire night awake sitting next to her yet ready for her battle-her next Day

After everything if we miss out on something we are called incapable or irresponsible. It’s not easy to be working and managing home at the same time. But we give all our efforts and if we falter please don’t criticize us. Try to understand us. We are like you, made of flesh and blood. You have weekends but do we have weekends. Our Weekends means cooking something good. Dusting and washing.

I didn’t write this article to prove how great we -the Women are, but just a request don’t underestimate us or criticize us shortcomings. We just ask for some love and respect added with a little appreciation. This is all we ask from you.

It even hurts us when we leave our kids in playschool and go to office. We even want to play with them. But if we are working it’s not only for the financial Independence. It’s for the Family.